Overzealous

Okay, I'll admit it. I got overzealous.

I saw local apples on sale at the supermarket and, against my better judgement, bought some.

Now, I am not one of those people who easily gives up summer. In fact, I am one of those people you hear cursing in the middle of CVS, exclaiming, "It's only August. Why the fuck is there stuff out for Thanksgiving?" Really. Who needs to be reminded that the chilly, dark days of winter will be upon us in just a few short months?! Not me!

I find myself clutching to every single last ray of sunshine before finally committing myself to the fall season. I'll wear flipflops and sundresses far past their appropriateness. I love summer! I love beach days! I love being tan! I am sad every time I see it go.

Which is why I had initially resisted the buying of these apples. Apples signifies autumn to me. It means leaves are changing and sweater season is upon us. While I have grown to really love fall too, I am not ready for it.

Despite my resistance, apples I did buy. Mealy apples at that. Ugh. Is there anything worse then a mealy apple? Apples should be crisp and juicy and sweet. What does one do with mealy apples? Some of you out there my choke these disgrace to fruit down. Or, like my family, carry it back and forth to work for several days before it's just too bruised and beat up that you need to throw it away. We refer to this phenomenon as "The Comfort Fruit."

OR you can do something really wonderful and ingenious with it and make a Cinnamon Apple Breakfast Bake! My, my, my, what smart girl would think to do something like that?!

Ahem...No need for thanks.

Cinnamon Apple Breakfast Bake

by Bonnie Graham

Cook Time: 25 - 30 minutes

Keywords: bake breakfast snack vegetarian apples cinnamon oats nuts fall

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Ingredients

• 3/4 c rolled oats
• 1 tsp baking powder
• 2 tbsp sucanat or other sweetener (add more to your taste)
• 1/4 tsp salt
• 1 tsp cinnamon
• 1/2 tsp nutmeg
• 2 - 3 tbsp golden flax seeds
• 3 - 4 tbsp silvered or sliced almonds
• 3 tbsp sunflower seeds
• 1 tsp vanilla extract
• 1/2 c apple sauce
• 1/2 c milk
• 1 1/2 tbsp coconut oil or other neutral oil (optional)
• 1 apple, diced into smaller pieces
• Optional add-ins: shredded coconut, chia seeds, walnuts or other nuts of your choosing, chocolate chips (who says you can't have chocolate in the morning?)

Instructions

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees

2. Add all the dry ingredients together in a bowl. Mix well.

3. Add vanilla, applesauce, milk, and coconut oil. Stir to combine.

4. Add in apples. Mix well.

5. Pour mixture into prepared baking dish.

6. Bake for 25 to 30 minutes. You can also broil for a few minutes at the end of the baking time to get a brown crust on top.

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Granola Muncher

I've had a SERIOUS hankering for granola lately! So much so, I even considered buying a bag of it at Whole Foods.

Granola in hand, on my way to the check-out counter, my "I can make that!" gene kicked into high gear. Why would I waste money on some over-priced granola when I can easily make my own? Lord knows we have enough grains to do!

Then, as if to punctuate the frivolousness of this purchase, I looked down at the nutritional information. Have you ever looked at the ingredients/nutritional information for store-bought granola? Because if you have, you've seen that there is enough sugar to put you into a diabetic shock! Okay, okay, maybe not that much. But there is a shit ton of sugar in most granola!

While it certainly taste delicious (and addicting) it's not exactly as good for you as you'd hope. With the "I can make that!" fever in full effect and my ridiculous craving for granola pushing forward, I decided to make a granola that would put all those other granolas to shame! Cry, Kashi! Cry! 


And I believe I have.

Cinnamon-Almond Granola


Ingredients
2 c rolled oats
1/2 c uncooked millet
1/4 c golden flax seed
1/2 c almonds
1/2 c pumpkin seeds
2 packets truvia
2 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp salt
1/4 c honey
4 tbsp almond butter
3 tbsp apple sauce
1 tsp vanilla extract**

**This granola would be even better if you put any dried fruit of your choice in. I did not because of that whole busted pancreas thing, but you should feel free.

Method
1. Preheat your oven to 350 degrees.
2. Mix ingredients from rolled oats through salt in one bowl. In a second bowl, mix honey through apple sauce (not the extract).
3. Place the bowl of wet ingredients into the microwave for 60 seconds. Add vanilla extract and stir well.
4. Mix wet ingredients and dry ingredients. Mix well to combine.
5. Spread granola out onto a pan lined with parchment paper. Bake for 20 - 25 minutes, flipping half way through to ensure even browning. Granola will crisp up as it cools.

Doubled Over

On the first day of my detox, I was doubled over in pain.

It's not clear how much that had to do with the detox or my stupidity. I had a dull pain start in my back and slowly creep its way over to my side and lower abdomen. Intially, I tried to ignore it, thinking it was fleeting cramps or something.

But as the day progressed, it got more intense. I began racking my brain for possible causes. I googled different ailments and the locations of certain organs. Was this my pancreas trying to bust out? Figuring he wasn't working anyway might as well take a road trip? Seriously. I googled the location of my pancreas. No, pancreas was too high for this pain. What about an appendicitis? That sounds like it could hurt. Nope, wrong side.

Between my writhing and fruitless google searching, I gave in and went home. Only to realize in the car that I had eaten raw almonds on an empty stomach earlier that day. For some reason, I always forget that raw almonds will cause me to feel as though an alien is trying to escape into the outside world by ripping its' way through my bellybutton until the damage has been done and I'm trying to decide if I should pull over to the side of the road to take the fetal position in the backseat of my car!

And, of course, it always passes.

A couple hours after arriving home (or, rather, to Jerry's), I felt fine. And hungry. Keeping with this detox is hard, especially when you think it's trying to kill you...and you go to the diner for dinner.
Truth be told, I did pretty well by just eating the salad bar and a bowl of vegetarian-friendly lentil soup. Yay me.