It was established long ago that I would be a serious liability in the event of the Zombie Apocalypse. And then I got diabetes.
Now, I'm not a big television watcher, but I got sucked into a show on AMC last year called the Walking Dead. This show scares the hell out of me, gives me nightmares, and creates an unreal fear that zombies are walking through my neighborhood at 2 AM. Obviously, I watch it religiously week after week.
After each episode, I try to think of the many ways I could survive the Zombie Apocalypse in spite of diabetes. This includes me looking up how long insulin can last outside of the refrigerator before it goes bad, how long I could sustain on a high protein diet before my body would start to process the protein as carbs, and whether zombies will be attracted to my scent if I ever go into ketoacidosis. You may be surprised to learn that I haven't been able to come up with an answer to that last question, but I'm certainly working on it!
In an attempt to hone my zombie killing skills, I downloaded the iPhone app Contract Killers: Zombies. In this game, I'm responsible for shooting zombies to protect myself and others. Obviously, this is just a game and NOT an indication of my actual performance during the Zombie Apocalypse. But let's just say, my zombie killing skills need some work!
Does being able to see the sight of blood, give injections without problems, remain calm in crisis situations, and crochet some kick-ass scarves help my chances at all? :)
Hmmm... also a big plus; if you can't control your BG level, and it creeps up and up, you will get severely dehydrated (I know that doesn't sound like a plus, but hear me out). There will be so much sugar in your system, and you will be so dried out, that you'll be halfway to Jerky already. Time is precious after Z day, and a week of marinating and windowsill drying can be difficult. Rule #3 - always keep moving. It can mean the difference between life and death... for me... you're Jerky either way.
ReplyDeleteMaybe that's a good topic for a follow up. How to "Jerky" things/Why diabetes will dry you out if you let it.