Ok, this is a toughie! But...can you NAME THAT SUBSTANCE?!
Tick Tock.....clock is running down!
Is it something Jackson might have puked up?
Perhaps something that has formed in the bottom of my refrigerator?
Could it possibly be the remains of my busted pancreas?!?
Or BBBRRRAAAAIIIINNNNSSSS? (Zombie reference. It's okay if you didn't get it.)
No, no, no, and no, but good guesses!
Believe it or not, this is something far more delicious then its outward appearance!
But first, let me help take your mind off its appearance by telling you about one of my new favorite ingredients, Liquid Smoke. If you've never used it, go out and buy some right now. Have you ever smelled a freshly open bag of BBQ potato chips, that lovely, spicy sweet scent? And you get the disgustingly delicious, artificially flavored mesquite goodness glued to your fingers? It's as though someone taken the experience, grounded it up, and turned into liquid form! In other words, it's like heaven in a bottle.
With that distraction underway, this, my friends, is actually my vegetarian version of a McRib sandwich. Because despite my loving description of fast food (chips included), I actually have no interest in consuming any of those things. I just wanted to sell you on the Liquid Smoke. I haven't eaten McDonald's in at least 5 - 6 years (besides Apple Dippers, a girl's gotta live!).
Obviously, I'm sure this taste nothing like a real McRib sandwich, but it was worth the recipe adventure!
McVegan BBQ Riblet Sandwich!
1 c vital wheat gluten flour
1/3 c nutritional yeast
2 tsp paprika
1 - 2 garlic cloves, minced
2 tbsp peanut butter (weird, but you can't really taste it)
2 tsp liquid smoke (you may want to use less if you don't think it smells like heaven)
1 c water (possibly more depending on the mixture)
1 c BBQ sauce
Rolls of your choosing for consumption
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
2. In a bowl, mix all the dry ingredients together. Once mixed, add all the wet ingredients. Combine until mixture starts to come together.
3. Knead your seitan (didn't know that's what you were making, right?!) for a few minutes. It will seem a little wet. That's okay because you want to be able to flatten it into a 8x8 inch baking pan.
4. Once you're done kneading, flatten seitan into a greased baking dish. I had a little bit of a hard time with this and add a sprinkles of water here and there to help it out. Once in the pan, score the seitan into pieces so it will break apart more easily after baking.
5. Bake 25 minutes. In the meantime, begin thinning out your BBQ sauce. You want to be able to coat the the pieces completely.
6. Once done baking, break apart the seitan pieces and toss with more BBQ sauce. Then, place back into the oven for another 15 - 25 minutes. I wanted my pieces to be less chewy, so I left it in there longer.
7. Let the seitan stand for 15 to 20 minutes before adding more BBQ sauce and enjoying on a roll!
Note: That this has a consistency more similar to other products on the market when left over night and then gently reheated the next day.